Alright it is that time yet again for another rambling from my brain. I've ranted about my feelings on memorials, I've told you a little something about myself and I've shared my hatred of musicals with you. I suppose now it's onto something that I love.....DOGS!!
Love those hairy, slobbering bastards. Dogs are pretty much the greatest animal since...EVAR! Unfortunately the world deems it necessary to divide itself into two categories...Dog people or Cat people. (I myself see it more like Dogs, Cats and people that seriously considering owning a primate, but I always get shot down on that one.)
Reasons why Dogs are a better option than Cats.
*random side note. When it comes to dogs I must clarify that we are talking about dogs over the 20lb mark. Anything under 20lbs is a whoopee cushion that you have to feed and take out to the bathroom. They don't count...they are lower than cats.
Another common counter is that "Cat people are shown to have higher IQ than Dog people..." Well you know what? Dumb people are more likely to make up things like that on the spot to make themselves feel better about being dumb. I don't care what you IQ is you're still an asshole, next point.
Finally, the point that is the most important as to why dogs are the best over Cats. LOYALTY. Dogs are mans best friend for a reason...they are damned loyal. For instance the movie 'Hachi', based on a true story about one dogs love for his owner....I'm not gonna get into it too much but let's just say you should stock up on tissues before you watch it. Come to think about it a lot of the world is filled with heart wrenching stories where the dog is the main character that tugs at your heart strings. Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, Turner and Hooch, Cujo, Homeward Bound etc. Those movies all bring out the tears when they come on BECAUSE of the pooch.
Ah almost forgot the single redeeming quality of Cats....Caturday!!
Love those hairy, slobbering bastards. Dogs are pretty much the greatest animal since...EVAR! Unfortunately the world deems it necessary to divide itself into two categories...Dog people or Cat people. (I myself see it more like Dogs, Cats and people that seriously considering owning a primate, but I always get shot down on that one.)
Reasons why Dogs are a better option than Cats.
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| You've actually never seen this dog happier than he is right now. (Pix with Paws) |
#1. They are so much more pitiful looking than Cats will ever hope to be.
#2. You can teach a dog to do neat tricks and what not. You teach Cats your daily habit and routine, making them adept at insurgent attacks.
#3. Dogs love you no matter what. Cats make their disdain and judgment known to you....I don't need Cats disdain and judgement, I get enough of that in real life.
#4. Dogs are good at catching bad guys. They lay landmines in the backyard for you, so IF you home is broken into it's that much easier to solve. Cats are probably gonna run out the back after the guy's been in your house looting your valuables (it's because they has no loyalties, they are a mercenary pet for hire.)
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| Because dogs have owners...cats have Humans. (cheezburger.com) |
#5. Although I suppose point #4 is mute if you have a dog...cause that is reason #5...Dogs are the best home defense system you can buy. No asshole is going to break into your house with a nice German Shepherd on the otherside of the door...SCIENCE FACT! Cats, again, are more likely to flee than defend the house.
*random side note. When it comes to dogs I must clarify that we are talking about dogs over the 20lb mark. Anything under 20lbs is a whoopee cushion that you have to feed and take out to the bathroom. They don't count...they are lower than cats.
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| If you can push your dog in a stroller, you're doing it wrong asshole. (Yelena_YK Flickr) |
I know what you cat people are saying as you read this...."But my cat isn't like that, it is very loving and adorable and it's just the cutest thing you've ever seen..." Well, I hate to break it to you, but you are more or less the battered spouse of the animal owning world, you are too far gone to see what a terrible situation you've gotten yourself into. It's ok I don't think you are dumb for it...I just make funny comments behind your back (I kid, I kid....or do I?)
Another common counter is that "Cat people are shown to have higher IQ than Dog people..." Well you know what? Dumb people are more likely to make up things like that on the spot to make themselves feel better about being dumb. I don't care what you IQ is you're still an asshole, next point.
Finally, the point that is the most important as to why dogs are the best over Cats. LOYALTY. Dogs are mans best friend for a reason...they are damned loyal. For instance the movie 'Hachi', based on a true story about one dogs love for his owner....I'm not gonna get into it too much but let's just say you should stock up on tissues before you watch it. Come to think about it a lot of the world is filled with heart wrenching stories where the dog is the main character that tugs at your heart strings. Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, Turner and Hooch, Cujo, Homeward Bound etc. Those movies all bring out the tears when they come on BECAUSE of the pooch.
Ah almost forgot the single redeeming quality of Cats....Caturday!!
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| This man is over 6ft...you decide if he's doing it right. (dogbreedinfo.com) |
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